Heaven and Hell
by spottedhorse
Summary: My entry in the sunny, funny ficathon. Rhett fulfills his promise to return occassionally to keep gossip down. Scarlett has plans.


Scarlett was full of anticipation. After three months, a telegram had arrived that morning from Rhett. He was keeping his promise to return occasionally to keep talk down. She would have another chance…she looked at the yellow paper one more time to confirm that it was real. _Arriving on AM train tomorrow. Will stay one week. No longer. Rhett._

One week…she had one week to change his mind. But she had to be careful, if she was too strong in her efforts, he might leave and never come back. One week, she sighed to herself.

She busied herself with preparations the entire day. Food was ordered, enough to prepare all of his favorite dishes. His rooms were opened, cleaned, and stood open to air out for the afternoon. All of his clothes were brought out of the wardrobe and freshened up, so that he might wear them while he was there. She made sure his humidor was filled with his favorite cigars and the decanter stood filled, ready for his use. By the end of the day, she was satisfied that everything was ready for his return.

She rose early the next morning and penned notes to each of her businesses, telling them that she would not be in for the week and leaving instructions as how business should be conducted in her absence. She closed with a warning: do not disturb me this week as I am looking after a family matter. As far as she was concerned, they could all rot while she was away because she would be using her time to win Rhett back.

Finally, the time came and soon she heard his footsteps in the front hall. Collecting her wits, trying to hold down her excitement, she straightened her dress and stepped into the hallway. He looked splendid, standing there as he handed his hat to Pork. He held a small valise in his hand and looked around the entry, his eyes gleaming with mockery. Then his eyes landed on her. Disdain remained on his face as he took in the sight of her. "You are looking well, my dear wife," he said derisively, barely polite for the sake of the servants.

_So this is how he intends it to be, _she thought_. He'll play the role but has no intentions of anything else. We'll just see about that! "_Why Rhett," she greeted him with all her coquettish charm, holding her hands out to him, that he might take them in his. "You are back. It has been so quiet without you." He did take her hands and even brought one to his lips for a cursory kiss before letting go. She saw the warning in his eyes, cautioning her to not go too far with the charade. "Your rooms are ready for you and I've asked Dilcey to prepare something special for our dinner."

He nodded. "Thank you, Mrs. Butler," he said politely, too politely for Rhett. "If you don't mind, I'll go and freshen up."

"Yes, of course," she smiled. "We'll talk later…" But he was already on the steps, his back to her as he made his way to the second floor.

It wasn't until late afternoon that she was alone with him. They were in the parlor, the children playing in the back and the servants moving about the house, completing their duties. "So how have you been, Rhett? And where have you been?" she asked lightly.

He grimaced at her. "I'm fine and I've been travelling," he said curtly. "And you?"

"I've kept busy. We've expanded the store…," she said casually. "And the mills?" he asked. "Oh Rhett, you know I don't own them any longer. I suppose they are fine. I haven't been out there since…oh, in ages…"

His eyebrow lifted and a smirk grew on his face. "What, are you denying yourself the company of the widower Wilkes?"

Scarlett sighed. "I told you how I felt about him when you…when…Mellie died. I haven't changed my mind. I see him occasionally when the children have been playing together but only briefly. Now that I see him for who he really is, I just don't find that much about him that interests me." She felt his gaze on her, scrutinizing and questioning, but she didn't look up. She was afraid of what she might see. Besides, she wanted to keep things pleasant and a longer discussion of Ashley Wilkes wasn't the way to do it. Finally, the topic turned away from Ashley and the room grew more comfortable, even if it was still cold.

The next morning Rhett announced that he had business in town and would be gone for most of the day. Scarlett was disappointed but managed to smile and wish him a good day as he left. She tried to occupy her time by playing with the children and tending to some household chores and going over the household accounts. By early afternoon she was so bored she could scream. Still, she refused to leave the house. By late afternoon, she was pacing in her room.

Rhett appeared in her doorway just before supper, refreshed and wearing a clean shirt under his jacket. Scarlett had taken her time in preparing for supper, having picked out an emerald colored dress that set off her eyes and was cut to accentuate her best curves. She'd dwelled over her little bit of make up, applying just a little rouge but highlighting her cheekbones in the process. Of course, she did all of this not knowing if he would appear or not, but wanting to be ready if he did. He looked at her appreciatively. _Well, that's better anyway,_ she mused. Mentally, she blushed as she returned his look, most definitely appreciating the cut of his coat and trousers and secretly recalling all that they contained.

He walked down with her and greeted the children in the dining room. Wade shared his afternoon adventure with Beau and Ella babbled on about her tea party with her dolls. Rhett smiled and nodded, seemingly attentive. But every now and then, Scarlett caught him looking at her oddly.

"And how was your day, my dear?" he asked sarcastically. "Are your business well?"

My day was fine. I took care of some of the household affairs and spent time with the children. I suppose everything is all right with my businesses. I didn't go to town today."

He looked askance at her, his eyebrow lifting slightly. "You didn't go to see about the store or any of your other…endeavors?"

"No, I didn't," she answered lightly. "I thought it best to remain at home today."

"And what of tomorrow?" His eyebrow was quirked and genuine surprise showed on his face.

The children were growing restless in their chairs. Scarlett looked at them and excused them from the table, smiling as they scampered out of the room. Then looking across at Rhett, she answered his question. "I intend to remain at home tomorrow also."

His brow furrowed. "It won't work, Scarlett. You waiting here for me all day won't change my plans. At the end of the week, I am leaving."

"Yes, you have told me that before. But I have chosen to spend this time at home. Whether you chose to do so or not is your business. And now, if you will excuse me…" Scarlett was fighting to remain cool, not give into her temper and say something that would make him leave sooner. She needed her week. "I think I will see that the children are preparing for bed." She left the room with out another sound, leaving Rhett confused in her wake.

The third day, Rhett again announced that he had business in town. Again, Scarlett smiled and said she would see him later then. Boredom set in early for her that day but she refused to leave. Surprise overwhelmed her in the afternoon when Mammy declared that she had a visitor.

Descending the stairs, Scarlett walked into the parlor to find Ashley standing in the middle of the room. "Why Ashley, what are you dong here?"

Ashley turned to her, agitated. "I heard that _he_ is back."

Scarlett stopped and frowned. "If by _he_ you mean Rhett, why…yes, he is."

"Scarlett, why do you tolerate this…his behavior. He doesn't treat you as a husband should treat a wife. He comes and goes as he pleases, leaving you behind to handle everything. And you never know where he is or what he is doing…"

"I really don't see why it is any of your business, Ashley. But…I accept that he does that. He is Rhett, after all. That is who he is…how he is. I wouldn't expect him to be tied too tightly to me. That is not his way. And he has always stayed when I needed him…"

"Not after Mellie died. Where was he then, Scarlett? You needed him then." Ashley's tone was accusing and Scarlett didn't like it.

"Yes, I needed him, but not as much as I thought at first. And he knew that. He believes in me Ashley, believes that I am strong …unlike so many others. _He_ doesn't see me as a weak willy-nilly that can't make up her own mind and needs smelling salts to make it through the day. But even if he didn't…I love him and I'll wait for him until I die, if necessary. Yes, he tends to wander and yes, it bothers me that he disappears for months at a time. But I have accepted that it is who he is. If I love him…and I do, then I must accept those things about him, just as I accept the finer things."

"Finer things?" Ashley grunted. "Oh Scarlett, there is nothing fine about Rhett Butler."

Her forehead furrowed ."Yes, there is…and I have seen those qualities. And…and I love him for letting me see that side of him."

"Really Scarlett…why don't you tell him to leave, once and for all. We could…we could…

"What Ashley? We could …what? You and I are nothing alike, there is nothing beyond a childhood fantasy between us and never will be."

"Once you said…you told me that…"

"A very long time ago. Rhett is the only man I'll ever love…really love."

"But Scarlett…"

"I believe that was your cue to leave, Wilkes," Rhett's cold voice resounded from the doorway.

Ashley looked up, surprised. "You don't treat her well, you know." He glared at Rhett.

"How I treat _my_ wife is between us. Your …intervention is not… required." His tone was steely and dangerous.

Ashley backed down and nodded to Scarlett. Then he headed for the door, passing Rhett without a glance.

Scarlett stood in the middle of the room, afraid of what Rhett was thinking. Quietly, she waited for his attack. But it didn't come. Finally, she turned to address him, but he was gone.

A light shone under his door as she passed it on her way to bed that night. He hadn't come down for supper and as far as she knew, he hadn't left his room since Ashley left that afternoon._ What is he thinking? Oh, I hope he isn't planning to leave already…_ She lay in her bed, pondering the events of the week so far. It was misery having him so close and yet so far away. Still, just having him in the house was heaven. She was happy, even if unsure of what would come next.

The next morning, Scarlett slipped into the dining room for breakfast to find Rhett already there with the children. They were laughing and giggling as Rhett told them an outlandish story. He was smiling and looked clear headed. _At least he didn't spend the night drinking…_

Scarlett said "good morning" and eased into her chair, watching the trio with amusement. This is how she longed for things to be. Rhett glanced up as he continued with his story, his eyes betraying his pleasure that morning. Dilcey brought their breakfast. Scarlett ate quietly, watching Rhett casually as he ate and teased with the children. Once they were finished, Mammy took the children up to the nursery, leaving Scarlett alone with Rhett.

"You didn't come to supper last night," she said as evenly as she could manage.

He smirked and stirred his coffee. "I um…had some thinking to do. Why, did you miss me, Mrs. Butler?"

"Yes, I did…and so did the children. But thank you…"

He tilted his head, confusion clearly in his expression. "You're…thanking me?"

"For not going out…spending your night…elsewhere."

"Ah…for _that_. I did promise to…keep scandal down. I usually keep my promises."

"Usually? You used to keep all of your promises, Rhett."

A strange expression crossed his face, one filled with regret and sadness, Scarlett thought. "There seems to be one that I can't quite live up to any longer." She looked at him, her brow furrowed as she tried to understand what he was talking about. "I um…did promise to love…until death do us part, I believe." Scarlett studied his face for some sign of how he was feeling. But he was maintaining his mask, the one he wore when he didn't want to show his feelings. Somehow, his effort to hide his feelings gave her hope. _He's confused…unsettled. Maybe there is a chance after all…_

"So did I, only I didn't understand what it really meant when I made that promise. Your love carried us through the first part of our marriage. And looking back, I was happy then, truly happy. How I could have been such a fool about everything is beyond me at this point. Everything seems so clear now. I loved you all along but I was too stupid to see it and even if I had, I'm not sure I would have admitted it. But I do love you Rhett. Maybe that'll be my cross to carry the rest of my life; so be it. It will not change."

Rhett rose from his chair and was across the room in seconds. He pulled her from her seat and looked deep into her eyes, as if he were searching for something. "Do you know how much I wanted to hear that from you all these years? I ached to hear it from you…"

Scarlett choked back tears, knowing he didn't want that. "I'm sorry, Rhett. I'm sorry I was such a fool. You deserved to hear it a long time ago. And in these months, I've done nothing but think back to all the times you were there for me, ready to help…or helping without me even realizing it. You loved me, you told me in every way but words…and stupidly, I threw it away. I hope that one day you will forgive me."

His brow furrowed, he took her face in his hands, searching her eyes, whispered her name, and then he walked away, almost aimlessly. He wandered out of the front door, barely recognizing that Pork had handed him his hat. Scarlett watched him go, silently offering prayers that he would come back…and soon.

Scarlett was on edge all day. The children tried to engage her in play but she was simply too anxious to participate. _What if he comes back only to leave for good? It has been so wonderful having him here, even if he has been cold. If he would only…only…stay. We could…_Her mind replayed images of the night of Ashley's birthday party. _He was so frightening but then he was so …wonderful. _She could feel him on her, his warmth covering her, his need creating one within her, still creating one within her. "Oh Rhett," she cried out to an empty room.

Finally, sometime mid-afternoon, he reappeared. She was in the parlor, willing herself to remain calm when she heard him in the foyer. Pride kept her in her chair but she knew she couldn't hide her anxiousness or her excitement at his return. Rhett entered the house and tossed his hat on the table in the foyer. Looking around, he spotted Scarlett sitting in the parlor and walked towards her. She watched as he stopped a few feet from her and tilted his head, quizzically. "You have been sitting here the whole time?"

"No," she said quietly. "I um…paced for awhile," she admitted demurely.

He looked magnificent, standing in front of her, so much so that Scarlett was having trouble breathing. Her need for him rushed through her, heat emanating from her core. Rhett grinned as he recognized what was happening. She knew he had the upper hand but she didn't care. _We've kept too much from each other as it is...maybe he should see how I feel. _So she let it out, let it show. His eyes surveyed her and a knowing smile grew onhis mouth, leaving him looking very much like a Cheshire cat full of self-satisfaction. Once his expression might have upset her, but today she didn't care. "You came back," she said hungrily.

His expression changed and his sarcastic smirk chilled her. "Dare I assume that you missed me, Mrs. Butler?"

She sat frozen, her mind in a frenzy, trying to find a way to warm the room. One thing she did know, she couldn't respond with anger; she would lose him forever if she did. His eyes were boring a hole in her as she sat, unable to respond.

Then his expression began to chance, to soften. "I'm sorry," he said quietly. "That isn't how I planned for the week to progress."

Scarlett was suspicious. _Just how did he plan for the week to progress, _she wondered. She pondered the question the rest of the evening.

The following day was much the same with Scarlett in sour spirits and Rhett leaving for "business in town." But as evening settled over the house, Scarlett realized that this evening was different. Rhett had not returned, as he had other days. After supper, she helped the children with bedtime preparations and Mammy led them off to bed.

Scarlett sat in her room anxiously. _Did he leave and not tell me? No, he's a skunk but he wouldn't do that…I don't think he would, anyway…_ A clock in the hall kept ticking and as more time passed, each tick became more irritating to her. _Where could he be?_ Morbid visions began playing in her mind, visions of him lying in the street, beaten…or perhaps dead. _No, not Rhett…never Rhett…_And then it struck her, where he might be…probably was.

Anger began to creep into her thoughts more and more…_That skunk…that low down varmint…he's doing this intentionally…after our conversation …me thanking him. Thank him, hah! I'll show him thank you…I'll …I'll…_Anger fueled her next move. She threw a cloak over her shoulders and ordered Pork to hitch the buggy. Then climbing in, she switched the horse and headed for town.

It had been a long time since she'd been near Belle Whating's place. Other than a fresh coat of paint, the exterior hadn't changed in years. Scarlett stepped out of the buggy and stood outside, staring up at the windows above. _Is he in there?_ She headed for the door, unaware of the buggy whip that she still held in her hand.

Once inside, she felt lost. There were "fancy women" everywhere and men leering at them. To her left was a large room with card tables. Two were surrounded by card players. Out of the corner of her eye, Scarlett saw one of the women scurry from the room and upstairs. _Ah hah…that must be where he is…_Scarlett started up the steps.

At the top, she came face to face with Belle Whatling. "Why Mrs. Butler, what are you doing here?" The woman seemed surprised.

"Is my husband here?" Scarlett asked angrily. She never liked the other woman and liked her even less now. Without thinking, she raised her arm, the one with the whip. Then she felt pressure on her forearm and looked to her side to see Rhett holding her arm, his dark eyes dancing with merriment. "What a surprise, my dear," he drawled.

Her green eyes flashed. "Yes, I'm sure it is; especially after our conversation about promises."

He shifted, his eyes glimmering. "As I said, I seem to fall short with my promises to you…" Scarlett stood, fury building as he talked. All of the past hurts and humiliations rushed in on her and then, as she looked around, the reality of where she was, what she was doing struck her. She wasn't listening to him as it all boiled through her but then she began to collect herself, just in time to hear him finish. "…and if memory serves me, you sent Prissy on this mission last time. Dare I take your presence as a compliment? And what is it you need rescuing from this time, my dear?" His voice was taunting and amused, which incensed her more.

"Why you…you…varmint," she seethed as she once again raised the whip. His laughter rang through the hall. It dissolved as she brought the whip down, however. With catlike reflexes, he caught her hand and swatted the lash away. She could see the anger in his eyes and then watched as it changed to something else, no less intense but of a different nature. Then turning to Belle, he calmly made his apologies for the unexpected entertainment and bade her good night. Grasping Scarlett by her elbow, he walked her back down the steps and out to the buggy. Suddenly her anger overtook her and she turned lashing out at him again with the whip, finishing what she had intended upstairs. "You low down skunk…you…you," her mind couldn't find words to express her anger and humiliation and so she stuttered. The whip caught Rhett across his shoulder. He heard laughter from the front porch and glanced that way to see most of the occupants of the house standing there, watching their show. Grabbing the line, he jerked her to him, catching her as she fell into his chest. They stood like that, breathing heavily and glaring at one another for a moment. Then taking the whip from her, he helped her into the buggy. He stepped towards the porch, took off his hat and bowed deeply, sweeping his hat low and across his knees. Grinning, he straightened up, then climbed in the buggy, and drove them home.

Once inside the house, he walked her to the parlor and closed the doors. "Your appearance at Belle's will be the talk of the town tomorrow, I imagine." His tone was quiet, unexpectedly so. "You'll be a hero with the Old Guard…they'll say you should have horse whipped me long ago."

Scarlett glared at him. "I don't care. After our conversation, I thought…I…you made me believe…" she was fighting tears and talking was difficult. Finally, she exhaled and was able to say what she was thinking. "I thought I could trust you…"

Rhett swallowed. "Yes, well…I um…this isn't how I wanted to have this conversation," he finally said. "I was at Belle's to get away for a few hours…clear my head. Nothing happened, Scarlett…nothing at all. I just needed to think."

_Conversation? He wanted to have a conversation? _She couldn't read his expression, couldn't understand if this was good or going to be bad. So she dove in. "Oh Rhett, I know I've been …wrong about …everything. I was wrong when I thought I loved Ashley and when I thought I didn't love you…and I was wrong about….well, so many things. I loved having you home this week but…" Her words were cut off by his mouth over hers, the warmth of his kiss melting her. Then he lifted his head, his face hovering over hers. "It's been so difficult and I finally lost my tem…" Another kiss, this one deeper and longer. She held him tightly, not wanting it to end. He eased away again, amid their heavy breaths. "And you know how I am when I am angry…" His laughter rang through the room. She stopped and looked at him, her temper rising in spite of the feelings his kisses had aroused. His laughter settled into a smile and he looked crookedly at her, his dark eyes twinkling. She loved the way he twinkled, creating a sense of mischief; it was one of the things she had always been attracted to. And she hadn't seen it in a long time, not since she had fallen down the stairs and lost their child.

As if reading her mind, he spoke softly. "I'm sorry…that I made you fall down the steps," he began. "But Rhett, you didn't make me…we both were …" she sighed. "It was an accident. If I hadn't tried to slap you…" His fingers covered her mouth. "After what I said, you should have slapped me. I wanted to slap myself for saying it. I knew…knew that you wanted it. I could see it in your face when you were telling me about the baby. There was something in your eyes…"

"Rhett, let's not…let's let that lie in the past. It was…so horrible. We both acted…horribly."

"Yes. And I was convinced that you hated me after that. You didn't even call for me," he said sadly. "Although I could understand why you wouldn't want to see me. I hated myself…"

"I wanted you Rhett. I was so…delirious, but I knew I wanted you. I think I called for you but…"

"So you said the day Melanie Wilkes died. I was…too tired to hear it though… tired and heartbroken."

"Oh Rhett, let's not look back…let's look only forward…"

"The mind is its own place, and in itself, can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven." He said wistfully, as if recalling an old friend. He took her hands in his and played with her fingers absentmindedly.

Scarlett watched his fingers intensely as they played over hers. "What do you mean, Rhett?"

"We had Heaven Scarlett and we talked ourselves out of it. I was thinking of the night…the night that baby was conceived. I um…well, my behavior was deplorable but I was so crazy with jealously and it finally got to me."

"Yes, you did begin horribly…in the dining room. But…that night, in my bedroom…it was…wonderful…heavenly." She said longingly.

His eyes glimmered as he looked at her. "Yes, it was. And then I spent the rest of the night full of recriminations. I was afraid I had hurt you. I was so afraid that morning when I went back in to you, to tell you that I was taking Bonnie on a trip. I had to run away, Scarlett. That night had been such…it was like Heaven, but I was in Hell."

"Oh Rhett," she sobbed. "For me too. I mean…it was so Heavenly, so wonderful. I awoke so happily and all I wanted was…more of you. I wanted to tell you…to mend things…make it up to you for keeping you from me. And then you left and…my mind conjured so many ugly things. And then I found out about the baby and I was so nervous. I was afraid you wouldn't want it…not with me." She sighed and was quiet, lost in her fears. She could feel him watching her. "When you left yesterday, I was certain you were leaving again…for ever."

He grinned, that sarcastic little grin that she loved, the one that was all Rhett. "That worried, were you?"

"I just…couldn't bear the thought that you would come back and leave again for good."

Rhett sighed. "I'm not leaving, Scarlett."

"You're not?" she asked hopefully, excitedly.

A broad grin broke out on his face as her excitement registered with him. "I um…thought that perhaps we might…start over?"

She jumped from her seated position into his arms. He grabbed her more out of reflex than anything and laughed at her impetuousness and then pulled her close to him, looking into her face. "You seem to be happy with the idea," he teased.

Scarlett was ecstatic, so much that she kissed him. He was surprised at first, she could tell, but willingly gave into her impulse and let her have her soft lips have their way with his mouth. He could feel her excitement as he held her and despite the darkness that had clouded their relationship for so long, he found himself laughing with joy. She broke away and stepped back, grabbing his hand. "And I know just where to start too," she said impishly as she led him upstairs.

gwtwgwtwgwtwgwtw

My line came from LAURA BUTLER: "The mind is its own place, and in itself, can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven." from Paradise Lost by John Milton.

Time: Before Rhett marries Scarlett or after the end of the book/movie.  
POV: Scarlett's (if possible)

This was a tough one, writing about heaven and hell and keeping it light, lol. Milton is never light! Anyway, this had a little angst in it, (I know …against the rules) but I couldn't help it. I hope it wasn't too bad. I've thought and thought and written and rewritten and can't seem to make it any lighter. After reading some of the wonderful entries, I went back to the drawing board but the karma just isn't there with this one. Sorry.

I chose to have it happen after the end because that's kind of how I saw their marriage, when I thought about the line. I had another idea centered around Rhett's speech at the gathering of men at the Barbeque, but it just wouldn't come together in my mind. So this is it. I hope you all liked it, in spite of its weight, especially LAURA BUTLER.


End file.
